Ta-ta for now

With all the pressure and frustration of keeping Diablito content, and the misery associated with said tasks, both Ma and Pa glanced over what was a truly funny moment.

Amongst all the Facebook nipple banning babble, and the latest headline on the liberal news network's website "Is public breastfeeding okay?" it reminded me...

Saturday was our inauguration. We managed to take the sprout with us to a local climbing gym, to see friends, introduce Junior and try our hands at climbing after a long hiatus.

As we soon realized,
-Our minds, bodies and muscles remember little about how to do it.
-The wailing of a 3 month old's echoes are amplified inside of a plywood amphitheater, almost successfully drowning out the remix of Daft Punk tracks

these combined to bring our climbing excursion from comical dismay to outright depressing.

Suki set off to a quiet corner in the upstairs loft of the gym. Seldom used and out of sight from the rest of the gym. With Junior splayed across her lap awaiting lunch, Suki revealed the source at the exact moment a fellow climber topped out. "Uh sorry about that".

So, what's your take on public breastfeeding?

I recall visiting the Vatican while studying in Rome. We were there for mass and had fantastic seats. Watching the Pope wave and recite prayers in Latin. Then the horrifying realization that a woman seated just behind us was bare breasted feeding her infant. It took a few moments for me to adjust, and come to the conclusion that it is natural. I mean if a Catholic doesn't need to feel guilty for doing something like this, with the Pope watching it can't be 'wrong'. Right?

INS

Don't call the border control quite yet, but have their number on speed dial.

Suki and I have our bags half packed and the car(s) fueled up and we're just about ready to cross the border...to insanity.

My first time as a new dad has been very new. Suki's second time as a mom has been new. The Professor is a handful or should that read earful for the last 12 weeks. Reflux, colic, green shits, drooling, and general fussy demeanor have left everyone and everything in the house on edge.

We've seen pediatricians, spoken to lactation consultants and read more than most on all of the above ailments and yet he still cries incessantly. I'm hanging my hopes for a piece of sanity on the premise that the first three months are the hardest. Suki, is losing hope rapidly and is worried about everything.

Her diet consists of nothing, and yet it doesn's seem to help with his food reactions. She is longing for a Conehead Sundae, I look forward to getting her one.

But if we are to switch from breastfeeding to formula, Prof HAS to eat from a bottle...easier said than done. It sucks (or in his case he doesn't).

We continue to try to comfort him and I support whatever we end up doing (BF or formula), I just want everyone to be healthy and sane...it may just mean my sanity remains as well.

We take turns losing our cool, unfortunately today, she's at the breaking point and I'm stuck at work. Thankfully her family is close and is coming up big for us. Perhaps we can take some time, decompress, talk about our options and regain our optimism once again.

Until then I'll be stopping at the store for earplugs and a visa.

Prick

The Professor received his first round of immunization shots last night. I warned the nurses that he is going to hate them. Suki couldn't bear to be in the room and I got to see the lil guy go bezerker for hours after.

Our pediatrician gave us some options for feeding...and gave us bottles of Formula. Something that both of us detest, but realize may be the solution to his belly woes and her lack of proper nutrition. I mean could you subsist on chicken and rice? (that's plain chicken and plain rice).

I couldn't, and I'm amazed and impressed that the Sukster has done it. She's wicked awesome.

I think she believes I'd be disappointed with her if we scrap the breastfeeding route and opt for formula. But that is not the case. I'm dedicated as is she, to going as natural as we can for the booger, but at what cost? Inconsolable crying, from him too? Lack of sleep, lack of food variety, sanity?

The testing of which foods are suspect, means that we are rolling the dice with his reaction and well-being and in turn ours.

What is more selfish? I don't know. All I know is that we want to do the best for him and it's proving to be a difficult task.

We've decided to shelf the formula and continue trying to figure out how to make it work...all the while we stare at the $60 bottles of scientific concoctions.

8th Graders

How do you teach them to be self regulating? How many tests do you let them fail before you intervene? How do you take away privaleges when they don't have much to take away?

How do you make them care? A couple of mid-terms have been graded and are not passing grades. Who gets D's in 8th grade? The kid is a spaz and ditzy, but she is very capable. I think she just doesn't care. So, maybe next year she'll pass 8th grade?

Between the youtube, myspace, google, text messages and make up she probably manages 30% effciency.

Today she was sitting in front of the tv, and we asked about her tests tomorrow and how well she thinks she will do on them...her answer..."I'll probably fail the one". So vegetate in front of the tube for another hour....that'll help.

She then wanted to check her grades online..."8 minutes" Suki told her, "then study". 20 minutes and three verbal reminders to get off the computer later, I went up to find her still at the machine (grades on screen) with youtube running. Her excuse was the machine took 20 minutes to load her grades. Perhaps it had something to do with running youtube videos?

She makes her way back downstairs grabs her books and asks where her cell phone is. I told her she doesn't need it for studying. She insisted that she couldn't study before she found it.

I guarantee she'll be taking three 15 minute breaks within the next hour.

It sucks...but either she hates us for clamping down, or she hates taking 8th grade classes again.

She can decide.

Fuck it.

I'm tired. My back hurts. My ears are bleeding. I'm thirsty, out of shape and tired...did I mention that yet? I can't recall, sleep dep has me wondering where the hell I am most of the time lately.

The house is never clean. Dishes and laundry provide good sources for cutting my mountaineering and alpinism teeth. I don't remember the last good poo I had.

Sex happens...on tv and as often as the new moon...by the way, the moon has some degree of resposibility for this entire situation.

Mountain biking, rock climbing, skiing, camping, MNF, and any other previous pursuits and endeavors are long lost.

Suki is right there with me...but apparently she has more of what it takes to deal and remain optimistic about a wailing 10 week old. I remind her that we shall soon be back on rock and on the trails, but honestly I know this could just be a pipe dream.

Q: What happens when you have an infant?
A: Nothin'

You try to keep up, which equals staying behind on everything. Minds, bodies and spirits are tested, tempers flare BUT...

It's worth it. To be right there, together, learning, supporting and loving.

I entered this relationship, carefully, ask a Suki, I tend to overthink. But I know with all of my heart that I want to be with a Suki and raise a family, together forever. Aside from an occasional shiv to the thigh and perhaps a bout with optical bleeding, each morning I wake to see her sleeping beside me or nursing the anti-christ...I'm reassured we made the right choice.

Fuck the dishes. Fuck the laundry. Spending time with the Mrs. (*sort of), the Professor and the Monkey equals perfect.

Now, about that climbing and biking....